Home Sweet Hooters

I dislike feeling at home when I am abroad. ~George Bernard Shaw

On my last night in Brasilia, my boss and I decided to go out for dinner and see the real Brasilia. Unfortunately, our only native Brazilian from Brasilia contact was busy teaching a law course at the local college. So, unsure of where to go, we asked the reception desk of our hotel where they would recommend.

"We're looking for something local, typical food from Brasilia, maybe with live music." I said in my best, brazilian sounding portuguese. "You know", I added, "where the povão go on a friday night."

I had used the word "povão"specifically to imply the local, regular ole, brasilia natives and as soon as those words left my mouth the receptionist's face lit up.

"Oh, you have to go to Peir 21." he said. "It has a great view and that's where everyone goes on friday nights."

Just to be sure, my boss looked over at the other receptionist busy typing at her computer and with a lifted eyebrow asked, "Would you also recommend Peir 21?"

"Oh yeah. It's got music and a great veiw. You're gonna love it!"

"Are you sure?"

"Com Certeza! Absolutely", she said nodding vigorously.

So, we called a taxi in our trendy bermuda shorts and strappy brazilian style sandals, my bosses daughter, dominique, sleeping in her carseat/carriage and headed to Peir 21. After 10 minutes on the highway, we could see the neon lights.

"Is that where we're going?"

"It can't be!", we whispered to each other.

But sure enough, our driver pulled up to a huge, brightly lit, partly outdoors mall, with a blazing red sign indicating that TGIF and [Something] Steakhouse were among our choices of dinner options.

"I can't believe it", I said.

"I can." answered my boss.

Trying to make the best of it, we decided to wander around the mall, looking for the small restaurant with brazilian food and the povão that our receptionist must have been referring to, but instead we found haggen daz, chocolate chip cookies for 5 reais each and in the back of the mall, overlooking the water a sign saying Coming Soon: HOOTERS!!!

"Oh god, I think I'm gonna be sick."I said.

"Hooters?! Hooters?! In the capital of Brazil?", she exclaimed.

"It doesn't even make sense", I said "since men here are all about the butt, not the breasts. And besides, no one here has even heard of buffalo wings."

"Well maybe they'll brazil-ify it and make the waitresses wear brazilian-cut, orange, underwear." She answered. To which we both laughed even though disgust and disappointment was written all over our faces.

"And the worst part is", she said as I read the rest of her thought at the same time, "that this is exactly were the povão and most brazilians want to go on a friday night."

www.hootersbrasil.com.br

Sigh.

Hooters is the trade name of two privately held American restaurant chains. There are now more than 435 Hooters restaurants in 46 U.S. states and 22 other countries, including Brazil, Canada, the United Kingdom, Mexico, Paraguay, Peru, Chile, Australia, Panama, Costa Rica, China, South Korea, Greece,Venezuela, Switzerland, and Singapore — its first overseas location to open. Hooters plans to open its first branch in Israel in the summer of 2007, and in Dubai later this year.

Axe: Rachel