Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays!

I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday this year. I miss you all, I miss home, however with Christmas already here, its obvious that the time is flying by. Before you and I know it, I'll be home. I wish you all joy, love and happy thoughts (like how I could've spent Christmas on the beach this year; that's a pretty happy thought). Happy Holidays!

Axe: Rachel

*notice how I was politically correct with the "happy holidays". hahaha. that's a remnant of attending NYJew (NYU).

O que a Baiana tem?

What's so special about Bahia? Where does this energy called axé come from? What is it that the bahians have that make them so attractive, so intriguing?

I think it may have something to do with this beautiful video by singer Mariene de Castro. Is it the water, the religion?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGpodXmqpSc

Axe: Rachel

Language For Dummies

Living in another country and learning a new language at 20 years old is not easy. Even after 6 months of studying abroad and 4 months (now) working, I still feel frustrated when I can't express myself adequately in Portuguese and make stupid mistakes instigating laughter by native speakers. I know that many people experience this as well however, no one's been successfully able present the complications of living and learning a new language as well as David Sedaris. Let me just add that David is one of my favorite authors and I was ecstatic and hysterical to read his dead on interpretation of the fear and embarrassment you subject yourself to when one decides to live outside the US and learn a new language.

" My fear and discomfort crept beyond the borders of the (french language) classroom and accompanied me out onto the wide boulevards. Stopping for coffee, asking directions, depositing money in my bank account: these things were out of question, as they involved having to speak. Before beginning [french classes], there'd been no shutting me up but now I was convinced that everything I said was wrong. When the phone rang, I ignored it. If someone asked me a question, I pretended to be deaf. I knew my fear was getting to best of me when I started wondering why they don't sell cuts of meat in vending machines.
My only comfort was the knowledge that I was not alone. Huddled in the hallways and making the most of our pathetic french, my fellow students and I engaged in the sort of conversation commonly overheard in refugee camps.
"Sometime me cry alone at night."
"That be common for I, also, but be more strong, you. Much more work and someday you talk pretty. People start love you soon. Maybe tomorrow, okay."
...Over time it became impossible to believe that any of us would improve...It was mid-October when the teacher singled me out, saying "Everyday spent with you is like having a cesarean section." And it struck me that, for the first time since arriving in France, I could understand every word that someone was saying.
Understanding doesn't mean that you can suddenly speak the language. Far from it. It's a small step, nothing more, yet its rewards are intoxicating and deceptive. The teacher continued her diatribe and I settled back, bathing in the subtle beauty of each new curse and insult.
"You exhaust me with your foolishness and reward my efforts with nothing but pain, do you understand me?"
The world opened up, and it was with great joy that I responded, "I know the thing that you speak exact now. Talk me more, you, plus, please, plus.""

-Davis Sedaris Me Talk Pretty One Day

Axe: Rachel

PIcture Update

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Home Sweet Hooters

I dislike feeling at home when I am abroad. ~George Bernard Shaw

On my last night in Brasilia, my boss and I decided to go out for dinner and see the real Brasilia. Unfortunately, our only native Brazilian from Brasilia contact was busy teaching a law course at the local college. So, unsure of where to go, we asked the reception desk of our hotel where they would recommend.

"We're looking for something local, typical food from Brasilia, maybe with live music." I said in my best, brazilian sounding portuguese. "You know", I added, "where the povão go on a friday night."

I had used the word "povão"specifically to imply the local, regular ole, brasilia natives and as soon as those words left my mouth the receptionist's face lit up.

"Oh, you have to go to Peir 21." he said. "It has a great view and that's where everyone goes on friday nights."

Just to be sure, my boss looked over at the other receptionist busy typing at her computer and with a lifted eyebrow asked, "Would you also recommend Peir 21?"

"Oh yeah. It's got music and a great veiw. You're gonna love it!"

"Are you sure?"

"Com Certeza! Absolutely", she said nodding vigorously.

So, we called a taxi in our trendy bermuda shorts and strappy brazilian style sandals, my bosses daughter, dominique, sleeping in her carseat/carriage and headed to Peir 21. After 10 minutes on the highway, we could see the neon lights.

"Is that where we're going?"

"It can't be!", we whispered to each other.

But sure enough, our driver pulled up to a huge, brightly lit, partly outdoors mall, with a blazing red sign indicating that TGIF and [Something] Steakhouse were among our choices of dinner options.

"I can't believe it", I said.

"I can." answered my boss.

Trying to make the best of it, we decided to wander around the mall, looking for the small restaurant with brazilian food and the povão that our receptionist must have been referring to, but instead we found haggen daz, chocolate chip cookies for 5 reais each and in the back of the mall, overlooking the water a sign saying Coming Soon: HOOTERS!!!

"Oh god, I think I'm gonna be sick."I said.

"Hooters?! Hooters?! In the capital of Brazil?", she exclaimed.

"It doesn't even make sense", I said "since men here are all about the butt, not the breasts. And besides, no one here has even heard of buffalo wings."

"Well maybe they'll brazil-ify it and make the waitresses wear brazilian-cut, orange, underwear." She answered. To which we both laughed even though disgust and disappointment was written all over our faces.

"And the worst part is", she said as I read the rest of her thought at the same time, "that this is exactly were the povão and most brazilians want to go on a friday night."

www.hootersbrasil.com.br

Sigh.

Hooters is the trade name of two privately held American restaurant chains. There are now more than 435 Hooters restaurants in 46 U.S. states and 22 other countries, including Brazil, Canada, the United Kingdom, Mexico, Paraguay, Peru, Chile, Australia, Panama, Costa Rica, China, South Korea, Greece,Venezuela, Switzerland, and Singapore — its first overseas location to open. Hooters plans to open its first branch in Israel in the summer of 2007, and in Dubai later this year.

Axe: Rachel

Black Semba

I just wanted to share with ya'll one of my new favorite singers & sounds in Salvador right now: Margary, Black Semba. "Black Semba" is like a mix of Samba with soul, konpa, R&B, some stuff sounds like straight up Haitian music... I dunno; Its just dope!

Check out the myspace page, listen to the cd and let me know what u think!

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=400597241


On the 26th, he's gonna be filming the music video for his song "Sabado Noite" (Saturday Night) and hopefully I'll be there, rockin my fro bigger -n- badder than ever and trying get my 15 minutes of fame in. LOL.

Axe: Rachel

Ba(rock) the White House!

My host sister, Christina Carney (Shout-out!) asked me a good question in my last posting of that Obama propaganda. She asked what Salvador's reaction was to the election.

Since well before the election, there seemed to be overwhelming support for Obama. Of course , it is note-worthy that a lot of the pro-Obama sentiment had nothing to do with Obama and more to do with Brazilians' profound hate for Bush and his war.

One of the most interesting things I saw was about a month before the election, these ads popped up all over the place, at the malls (Shopping Barra) and at bus stops of Obama and the phrase "O Poder Mudou", "The Power Has Shifted". Initially, the ads had no name or person affiliated with them but after about a week up, with people buzzing about the ads, the ad turned into the fake front page of a newspaper here called Correios whose new slogan is all about change (since they recently revamped the paper).

Since Obama's won, I've passed many people on the street talking about the election and Obama and its been mostly good. I wont lie though, I've always said that black people are their own worst critics and racists and there are plenty of people here who are definitely hating. One old -crazy- black man on the street said to me, "Who cares. Bush, Obama, same thing! We're still all gonna die from the crisis." Hater.

One thing Ive said to many people here, and they all seem to agree, is that Obama is not a miracle worker. In reality, he may not be able to change that much, however for all the black boys and girls, men and women in England, Peru, Somalia, Ghana, the US, Brazil... everywhere, who feel under appreciated, weak, unimportant, invaluable because of they are black, this is a great victory. For the media who loves to propagate stereotypes of us as gangsters, ignorant hustlers, maids, not-as-beautiful, always the sidekick, never the star, Obama's confident, articulate, intelligent, fine ass is something the media cannot deny nor ignore. He's like two scoops of (foine!) chocolate with the nuts. Gostosooooooo.

And on that note, I'm finally as proud to be American, as I am to be Haitian.

God Bless the first and only country self-liberated from slavery. The True Quilombo Country.
&

God Bless the Country where opportunities and change are not just dreams but a reality.

Deus abençoa Obama!

Axe: Rachel

Enjoy This!

Ive been trying to get some cohesive thoughts together about how happy I am about our President Elect Obama. However, until I get it together enough to write a lil sumtin sumthin, enjoy this. I read this and snorted pineapple juice out my nose!

On the Planet of Brasilia

So as you can see from the photos, I went to Brasilia last week on a business trip. My boss was invited to attend a American- Brazilian partnership conference to discuss the anti-racism proposal that Condeleeza Rice proposed and signed in Salvador back in March. I tagged along to sit in on some of the meeting and also to be a au pair (sounds better than babysitter) for my bosses 6 month old beauty, Dominique.

Brasilia, by the way, is the capital of Brazil and if you want to know more about its interesting history, Wikipedia it. Look, Ill even make it easy for you. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brasilia

If you didn't wikipedia it, (you lazy mess) Brasilia is known for 2 things: architecture and government. Since I live in beachy, Salvador, Bahia, afro epicenter of the Americas, vibrant with dance, art, and music, my excitement for seeing Brasilia, which is smack dab in the center of Brazil, was fairly low. However I did have a good weekend there. Why?

Well first, I had forgotten about how nice cable television is and I got to watch Gilmore Girls and Project Runway in my hotel room. (Amazing) Second, I met some very interesting people at this conference against racism including the director of the Schomburg Museum in NY. Third, and possibly most importantly, Brasilia looks like a city built by someone who was high onShrooms and dreaming about floating through outer space! It's friggin crazy! The pictures explain it all. In Brasilia, there are no hills just flat open space and funny shaped buildings. I think I saw Marvin the Martian chilling in the Brasilia National Museum. And Last but not least, I enjoyed being in Brasilia because there's no better way to remember how great a place is than to leave it for a little bit. And Salvador is indisputably amazing!

Scrapbooking Brasilia photos

Crack Heads Are Us: A friendly profile part I

Have you seen these two?

If you have please call the police immediately as they have resisted arrest countless times for being a hot mess, hot mess. You may find them on the beaches of Salvador Bahia or at UPENN College Parties dry humping, dropping it like its hot and drinking all the booze. Beware, these two are very dangerous. They are both expert facebook stalkers and have already stabbed 30 innocent civilians with a pear! They can usually be found with a stank look on their faces and they may try to slap you with an authentic havaiana sandal. Please do not feed them! This will only make them attach themselves to you further. Call 1800. SAUD-ADES and I'll take care of it ASAP.

When it rains, it pokes

This post has been on my mind for a while and I thought this may be the appropriate place to tackle this subject...

I HATE irresponsible umbrella users. You all know what I'm talking about. That person who is walking with his/her big blue umbrella talking on the phone, not watching where they're going and accidentally pokes you in the forehead as you pass. Or the tiny, short woman who refuses to lift her huge yellow umbrella forcing you to bend down to avoid getting stabbed by the metal rods on the end. ANd my personal favorite, the person who lets their 3.99 walmart umbrella sway back and forth, not paying attention while their disney themed umbrella gets tangled in your hair and yanks a good chunk of it out.

You may be thinking, Rachel what the hell are you talking about? Umbrella accountability people. Thats all I'm saying. Umbrella Accountability

Axe:Rachel

speed racer go!

Photobucket Album

A note on the title of my blog

I won't lie. I didn't really know what debauchery meant when i decided to call this blog Rachism: Traveling and Debauchery. I thought it sounded nice and that debauchery was a synonym for craziness. So I was obviously a little surprised to read this definition on dictionary.com

Debauchery

De*bauch"er*y\, n.; pl. Debaucheries. 1. Corruption of fidelity; seduction from virtue, duty, or allegiance. 2. Excessive indulgence of the appetites; especially, excessive indulgence of lust; intemperance; sensuality; habitual lewdness.

Wow! If I had to chose one word to define my experience in Brazil, it would most definitely NOT be "debauchery". Ha! However, when thinking about my experiences and Bahia more, I can see how I must have chosen debauchery subconsciously.

For one "excessive indulgence of the appetites" is really excessive indulgence in my appetite... all the time. (See post on Traveling 101 for fat asses) And if being American can be considered a relationship between me and the US, then there is definitely some "corruption of fidelity" going on. I am constantly telling people I'm Haitian and conveniently forgetting to mention how I've lived most of my life in the US. I actually think it was the fear of being conned and robbed all the time that encouraged me to speak portuguese like a Brazilian. And as I become more fluent and speak with less of an accent, I completely deny any allegiance to the US and let people assume that I am (gasp!) a Bahiana!

And as for lust... well, sweaty, brown, Brazilian bodies vibrating samba rhythms, twisting, dropping, flirting, smiling.... enough said. You can stop drop drooling now.

Axe: Rachel

Parabens!

Happy Birthday to Me!

I'm sure many of you are wondering how I spent my birthday... did I go skinny dipping into the Atlantic Ocean, or have a rooftop house party by the pool at Vila Pimp (my old residence)? No this year was pretty low key. I hung out, had a dance class and went to the usual Tuesday party, Geronimo. I enjoyed it. Drinking beers and eating yummy acaraje was much different from my 21st birthday where I sipped pink champagne and ate coldstone cake however I truly enjoyed myself. Got a lil tipsy from the skol and pineapple-roscas Mmmm... No stress about guests or worrying about the perfect dress or getting a cake. It was great.


However, I did buy gorgeous, new, green, kinda Greek looking sandals for the occasion. What can I say? ... You can take the girl out of NYC but you cant take NYC out of the girl!

Thanks to everyone for the birthday wishes!

Axe: Rachel

My New Crib

As I mentioned earlier, I just moved! My old apartment was... interesting and it was time to get the f*** up out of there. Why you ask?

Here's the official "List of Reasons I Needed To Move My Black Ass"
( side note: I did not make any of this up; its the whole truth and nothing but the truth, which is so sad)

1.) There was no sunlight. My apt was in the back of the building on the 1st floor so I had no windows and got no air or sunlight. I did have a service area that you could kind of see a little bit of the sky but not enough to tell if it was cloudy or sunny.
2.) It was too dark.
3.) My Brazilian neighbors wash clothes for a living so our water bill was a nightmare! Oh yeah and the most important part, they conveniently don't pay it!
4.) My Brazilian neighbors also "accidentally"dropped their Candomblé pigeon into our apartment... twice.
5.) My landlord's crazy.... i mean, he's a nice guy. But all I'm a say is UFO= Angels? And if so does UFO abduction + my landlord = son of god ??? You think about that.
6.) My landlord's also moving back to the US and leaving the apt in someone else's hands.
7.) The Landlord's son had a psychological breakdown and almost killed himself in the street in front of our house.
which leads me to the final reason...
8.) I seriously think that place is haunted.

Thank God I'm out of there!

My new place is in Nazare, close to the mall Shopping Lapa. It's a one bedroom with lots of windows and sunlight and air. And it's in a condo with a doorman so i don't have to worry about the mailman jackin' my mail if I'm not home.

Here are some visuals: This is the front walk up. This is my luxurious living room... This is my view of the pool. And last, my gorgeous room.

Ok, not really. I would show you real pictures but my camera's broken. However my new place is very cute. period.

Axe: Rachel

You are the champion, my friend!

You know how when you where in elementary school your teacher used to smile at you and say in a sweet, soft voice "Everyone's a winner because we are all special!"

Well, I'm sorry to say that if your name is not William Lee then you are a big fat loser or a skinny bitch loser (You know who you are).

William Lee is the only special winner of the 2nd Brazilian thong giveaway! He's the champion, the vencedor, the man, the special one; He's Neo in fio dental.

I just hope he uses his new Brazilian thong to practice Brazilian jujitsu. There's nothing better than a dude who kicks ass, while showing some ass. MMMM...

William, be sure to send pictures! Beijos!

Axe: Rachel

And The Winner Is...

(ddrrruuummmm rrrrroooolllllll ) And the winner is: TARA NICOLAS!!! Tara was the 1st person to comment on my blog and will receive a authentic Brazilian thong bikini aka "fio dental" or dental floss. I want to congratulate her for winning amongst the hundreds of thousands of people fighting to leave comments here. Congrats sweetie!

However, since I personally know how many authentic Brazilian thongs Tara already owns (hundreds, all of them teal), I figured I´d give someone else the chance to win one... even the boys!!! (see picture) Or maybe you´d prefer to re-gift the thong... whatever.

And maybe, just maybe, I´ll even double the number of comments I´ve received in the HISTORY of this blog! Well, let me not get my hopes too high.

Anyhoo, to win the thong you must be the first person to answer the following question correctly:

Which of the authors on my favorite books list to the right is Brazilian?

Good luck and Godspeed!

Axe: Rachel

How do you say "professionalism" in Portuguese?

So, I found a new apartment (finally!) and my new landlord and I went to a notary office yesterday to get the contract notarized. We took a number and waited for about 45 minutes for our number to come up (even though there were only 2 people ahead of us). Side note: This is normal, by the way, because time doesn't signify much here; it's sort of like a guideline... a very loose guideline. Anyways, we finally get called up to desk 14, I sit down across from this thirty year old Brazilian man and I notice right away his t-shirt. No joke, he's wearing a pink t-shirt that reads "no plastic. 100% real. just how i like em!"

Q: Ummm... when did it become appropriate to wear that t-shirt with dress shoes to your office?
A: Apparently when your boss doesn't understand what it says.

It's actually really funny because Brazilians LOVE to use t-shirts with english on them and many of the t-shirt are:
a) totally inappropriate and the person has no idea or
b) or make absolutely no friggin sense!

Some examples I've seen: A busty Brazilian blond walking down the street with the words "ABUSE ME"in bold print stretching over her breasts. The t-shirt I almost bought until I flipped it around and saw that it said "the most sex girl of all galaxy" on the back. huh???

It made me think, "Man! I wish America had a trend like that, were it would be really cool to use t-shirts with german sayings on them... and Germans would walk around laughing at the stupid t-shirts we'd be wearing" And then I remembered, hey that's not so different from the getting a chinese/ japanese tattoo trend except that getting hot dog juice tattooed on your lower back thinking that it means destiny provides asians with a lifetime of pointing and laughing at your dumbass while a stupid t-shirt can be removed, burned and later denied... Just don't forget to burn the pictures!

Axe:Rachel

Lunch break...

It’s a beautiful Friday and where am I? At work, sitting on my little wooden chair, in front of my computer screen, looking over at the window, wanting to cry. (See Picture) The windows taunting me, laughing in my face with its view of the teal, blue water and one large coconut tree between my office and the beach. FIGURES. Yesterday, I didn’t have work and it was cloudy all day. I think I may start being very Brazilian and take a 2 hour lunch. Go eat some fried fish, rice and beans and drink a cold beer on the beach. Like they say, when you’re in Rome do as the Romans do… besides Brazilians aren’t that different from Haitians so from 12-2PM, you know where I’ll be.

Axe: Rachel

Traveling 101 For Fat Asses

Since I’ve left NY, I have been craving my favorite foods. This always happens and I thought I had prepared sufficiently by stuffing my face with pancakes, sweet potatoes, Chinese food and NY pizza the week before I left however, I still want to strangle someone when I think about not eating IHOP or Boston Market sweet potatoes for a year.

 

Lately, thought, I have been replacing my American food obsession for Brazilian ones and this has been working really well. For example, the melted cheese with sweet syrup that they sell on the beach, I can eat 3 of them in one sitting. And today I discovered my breakfast obsession to help me forget about pancakes and bacon and waffles (mmm)… it’s this oatmeal that this guy sells in a little cart on the street. Now I know what you’re thinking, that oatmeal could never compare with IHOP but this oatmeal is delicious! I don’t know what the hell it is, but its got little lumps in it and he sprinkles some cinnamon on top and I just melt. Today I bought two cups from him and walked to the bus stop with everyone staring at me, probably thinking “there goes that fat ass American girl”. However, I don’t give a f*** because that oatmeal is gostoso/ damn good! And as long as I keep walking up the favela hills here, my fat ass will stay tight in my fil dental/ dental floss bikini!

 

 

Axe:Rachel

Welcome...

My name is Rachel and I'd like to welcome my currently non-existent readers to my blog.

I am an NYU alumnus who is currently living in Salvador-Bahia Brazil. I am volunteering with an NGO here, learning about the non-profit field and getting ready for graduate school.

Really, I just spend the majority of my time eating melted cheese and honey on the beach and sipping on coconut water. (See picture)

I am writing this blog out of the saint-like goodness in my heart and my sincerest commitment to helping others. Hopefully, you (my non-existent readers) will have a good, out-loud laughing fit at your office, completely embarrassing you in front of your co-workers, and maybe even causing you to lose your job... or at least you'll have a chuckle or two reading my blog completely on my behalf (I'm so selfless!)

What I'm trying to say is, I hope you enjoy my neurotic rants and embarrassing episodes!

Muito Axe : Rachel